The final performance starts in 30 minutes and I’m nervous. There is a 5 page script but I don’t have any idea what it will be like or what will happen. Will it be interesting or boring? Will people get into it or feel silly or uncomfortable? Any way it turns out, I feel that tonight is a success in that I am doing something that makes me nervous, pushing myself outside my comfort zone. This is letting go, giving up control, and trusting myself and others to do whatever feels right.
This performance is entirely a collaborative effort. It was exciting to watch yesterday as friends, family, colleagues, and strangers came together online to create this thing. It will require everyone present tonight to play a part and contribute, no one person can make or break it. It is neat to come together and try this thing, none of us knowing how it will turn out or what we might learn or understand by doing it. I think it is largely about just experiencing, letting go of expectations or preconceptions and just embracing what is going on in the moment.
In addition to being a review and a performance it is also a celebration. The end of this very long project. I hope that we can just have fun with it and enjoy the evening.
Monday, February 22, 2010
[Setting: bedroom, 6am. LAUREN wakes up. She spends today preparing for tomorrow's performance.]
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